Now I know who's true and who's not.

Please laa. You said you reflected. You think I believe you. And wtshit went wrong man. Anyway you were lying, so what. I'm supposed to believe in your lies is it. Why did you ask for an apology? Just because I said "Whatever." is it? And I would like to know what went wrong either, thanks. Ask me to think, think about what. Yeah laa think about how suckish my life is right. -.- Your life's way better than mine so just keep quiet. Since when did you talk this way. I don't know you. If you were thinking I was talking about them, you're freaking wrong okay. Don't assume things. So now, you accused me. So now, I've got every right to be pissed okay. So much for a clique, thanks aye. What makes you think I was talking about you guys. What makes you think that I was even referring to anybody, huh? Seriously laa, don't assume things okay. Even if I was talking about you, I wouldn't be a two-faced asshole and say I'm not talking about you. Yeah, yeah, I made everything worse. Everything's my fault. Where the heck have you gone to man. I can't believe I've got to write this post man. The truth is, I wasn't referring to anybody, up to you to believe. I wouldn't be such a low-lifed person. This post was seriously forced by you. What's wrong man?

Don't accuse me for what I did not do.

/edits.
I don't want things to end this way either. I don't like things to be this way either. I'm not trying to make things worse. I'm just trying to find out what's wrong, when I didn't do anything wrong, for as far as I know. Even if I did, you could have told me. Even if I did, you could have told me what my mistake was. Things aren't going the way we want it to. You know it, I know it.

If only,

K I'm damn sorry. I've not been blogging regularly. Don't ask me, but I myself don't know where my blogging mood has gone to. To be honest, I've never thought about blogging at all :x Anyway. Yeahh, during these days that I didn't blog, quite some things happened, no bad things laa, fun things, yay. Went to friend's house, Universal Studios, played fish game (YAY.) etc. Hm. Now I still don't feel like blogging. So I'm just going to try to drag this as far as possible. HAHA. Lalala. What should I do sia. Holidays are ending damn quickly. During November I was dying for school to reopen. But now, nooooooooo. I don't want! I just started relaxing and enjoying my damn holidays so you jolly well extend it. Hai. Idk laa. This holiday damn sad life can. Didn't even go to Malaysia, &^%$&*^($! Suck max ): At least bring me to Genting for crying out loud. Hai. Let's just wait till March. Going to Korea, I hope :D K. Long enough or not. I'm still very lazy sia. Oh oh oh, I went to the Revenge of the Mummy like 7-9 times at Universal Studios. So zai right. And we got stuck in the rapid ride -'- But they gave us complementary express pass. Hah. So I guess it was okay laa. K I'm done kthxbai.

Don't cry because it's gone, smile because it happened.

I shouldn't carry on like this anymore. I appreciate what my friends do for me. There's no words that can explain how much I want to thank them. Things happen for reasons. I should just accept that fact and move on with life. Perhaps, this is just one of the darkest moments in my life. There's more to come. I've got to be strong, and learn how to face the music. Crying doesn't help, maybe it'll just let you feel better. I really don't know what to do tomorrow during Drama. I really don't know how to face the people there. What should I do? Feel ashamed about myself, or pretend that nothing ever happened? I really appreciate everything you guys did for me. But I really have no idea where the old me has gone.

If doing extreme things makes everyone and myself happier, I'll do it.

I didn't choose who I wanted to be.

I don't like it when..

I take things personally.
I cry in front of my friends.
Feel so lousy about myself because of certain reasons.
Etc, etc.

I don't like who I am right now, and I really mean it. I'm crying almost everyday. I'm taking things too personally. I have a heart that's made of glass. I have feelings which are totally sensitive about basically everything.

But honestly, it's not like I want it. I cannot choose who I want to be. If I could, I'd definitely be a much happier person. I don't like whom I am either. What can I do? Nothing's going to change my character, I'm serious.

However, one thing I can control. The way I take words. I don't have to take it personally. I could turn a deaf ear. But no, I didn't. I just had to show how weak I was. I was already tearing when the words entered my ears. How can I change? Easier said than done.

I don't want the current me. Really. I need my friends. The way you guys all treated me today. I cried because I was sad, I cried because I was touched. When you guys saw me step into school, I loved the way you all reacted. You guys walked up to me, and just hugged me. I know you guys saw me cry too many times. I didn't even get this upset when I broke up.

Thank you:
Adeline, Angela, Dayna, Dodges, Eunice, Fong Xin, Jiawei, Johanna, Nicole, Ronnie, Weiliang. And Kaijie. Thank you for being by my side whenever I need you guys. I just can't thank you enough. (:

Kaijie:
I know you may not see this, but I'm still writing it, it's the thought that counts. Anyway, I know we had our misunderstandings with each other. I know there was this little while when we hated each other. But, it isn't there anymore, I promise. Today, when you walked up to me and grabbed my shoulders, and told me that it was alright, I really was ashamed, I didn't dare to look at you. I just want to say, thank you and sorry.

I don't want to carry on with these stuff. Enough is enough.

I don't need you by my side, I can take this with my friends.

So let's see. People still think that I'm feeling emo and down, when in fact, I'm not (: I post emo shits on Facebook and Twitter, but I don't really mean it. Well actually I do. But I don't say things like "I love you" anymore. I say things more like "I don't miss you." And I really don't mean to be sacarstic whatsoever, I really mean it. Well, anyway, I've forgotten you and that's for sure. All I need right now is friends my side, and Shyan Kang to come back from Korea! Or maybe he died in the war or something o.o Hahahah, just kidding. Didn't know for what reason, I suddenly had this temptation to blog. Sorry for not being a good blogger these few days/weeks okay. Really had no mood. Hoping to find it back. There's drama tomorrow from 9-4 again. I'm looking forward, maybe except for dance. I don't like the dance, it's boring like ttm. Anyway, hopefully tomorrow won't be as boring as previous lessons. Eunice sprained her ankle yesterday. Get well soon okay! (: Had a fun chat with Adeline and herself just now. So much literal laughter, haha. I need Funshion like really really need it. Unfortunately, my mother's laptop doesn't have it and she doesn't allow me to download it because she's afraid it might contract virus. Oh, never mind. I tweeted over a hundred tweets today. Cool right. I was like addicted for that moment, and still am :D Heh. Chatting with Jiawei on MSN now. And it's still early. Not tired yet. This morning's sleep was rudely interrupted by my mother. Whatever. Anyway, this is kinda a long post? Enjoy. I won't be replying tags this time round! Hahah, trying not to be too lazy anymore. Kthxbai! :D
-
I don't need you like seriously.

Forget me, Forget you.

I don't see any reason I should continue being upset, being depressed. It isn't worth it, it's in fact kinda stupid. Nothing came out from that relationship. Singlehood's still the best though (y) I tweet about emo posts, but seriously none of them had a meaning in it. (I just wanted to tweet more but I just couldn't think about anything I could tweet.) Anyway, yeah. I've gotten over it. I need my friends, I don't need you. I'm happy without you, I'm happy with you too. But this is the best for both of us, I know it. I loved you, but not anymore. I appreciate your love for me. I won't think about you anymore. I won't get sad nor depressed anymore. You're just an awesome friend to me. Thankyou for the past (: I love you, as a friend. "Because there's always a rainbow after every storm."

Day 2 without you. The feeling's honestly not unbearable. I guessed I cheered up a lot. I hope my mind doesn't run wild during this weekend without Drama. Thanks a lot to my Drama friends who cheered me up! Love you all, heehee. Friends are the real ones we can't live without.

Cameron Chen Jin,
♥You're perfect in my eyes.
GeylangMethodistSecondary; Faith1-2'10; 230897, 13; Single/Attached
I'm not perfect, so are you. So don't judge me.

Because there'll always be a beautiful rainbow after every storm. Time heals everything.


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I wish.
-Canon Camera DSLR.
-Macbook/iMac.
-iPhone 4.
-Zinc bag.
-Pencil case/Wallet from Wallet shop.